cofI would probably best be advised to quit my resolutions (and writing about them), though that’s more or less what I inadvertently did in July.  This is a fail more epic than all the other fails and the fish and chips I snuck in on 30th July were so un-fish-like that I thought it was chicken, but it’ll have to be fish as I haven’t eaten much fish, and, really, that isn’t even the most unachievable of my 12 things.  August couldn’t really get much worse than July … you’d think.

Oh the shame …

  1.  3 times per week at gym.  No.  I’ve been eight times in July, though in my defence I’ve had a mutating catarrh and cough bug for half the month, which still isn’t at all ok, and three of those gym days were while I was staying in a hotel, my having taken gym wear on a trip being a massive first, so kind of double points for that.
  2. Website with clear purpose.  Not even looked at it except to copy a link to something within it, which so doesn’t count but at least proves I can remember my URL.
  3. Quit steno.  Oh, it’s not all doom and gloom after all, I have made some good moves thinking about the food outlet I’d like to have, but in fairness this has focused primarily on eating a lot in the name of research.  It feels productive though.  Ish.
  4. Lose 14 lb.  Note above comment about research.  Also, with half the month in hotels,  I can’t be blamed for failing this so spectacularly, though I am actually beginning to hold back on the buffets.  Have avoided scales most of July as I think the results will be fairly predictable.
  5. Write two blog posts per month.  Oh, don’t be ridiculous.  Though I feel a glimmer of hope that I have at least managed to write this post at the right time.
  6. Read 12 books.  I read one, City of Djinns by William Dalrymple, which I loved; such a fascinating, evocative and well-written book about Delhi, where I am while writing this.  I started another Delhi book in July so I’m managing the minimum of one book a month so far.
  7. Mobile on silent more.  Still a success, hurrah for number 7!
  8. Reduce amount of clothes.  Oh.  Turns out Delhi has some great clothes shops.  I’ll probably get rid of some clothes to make way for them when I get back to the UK …
  9. More picnics.  It’s summer, picnic season.  I’m trying to think of anything I’ve eaten outdoors.  I may have eaten one lunch outside.  I am now having to re-think the definition of “picnic”.  I think it should be more of an event than a sandwich consumed from a bench circled by pigeons in the midst of a London paved area.  Maybe I should change it to “More al fresco dining”, which obviously isn’t at all a pretentious way of saying “eating outdoors”.
  10. More fish.  I may have had the worst fish and chips ever this month.  In Delhi, foolishly, I thought I should try Indian British food in India as I so often have British Indian food in Britain.  I now know what disappointment feels like on that score.  Part way through the fish, I actually questioned whether it was fish or chicken I was eating, that’s how bland it was.  And the tartar sauce was hardly better than mayonnaise.  And the chips were salt and vinegar free.  I feel like a discussion was had in the kitchen about what makes British fish and chips and someone said “bland”.  I had some prawns earlier in the month and there may have been one other fish dinner but, really, what a fail, especially if my fish and chips really was chicken and chips.
  11. Tax in May.  Oh, go on, put me out of my misery, I’m sure you can guess this one without my spelling it out.
  12. Christmas shopping by November.  See above but more emphasis on the “yeah, right” eye-rolling.

et cetera